Discovery - Day 1

Discovering your husband's betrayal is an experience that is beyond description. Only those who have been there can understand the pain and shock of discovery.

A journal entry from December 23, 2013

I can’t believe it. I am sitting here trembling. I feel sick. For twelve years I have never once doubted I could trust Joe in all things. And now, I have a knot in my stomach. Blood is thrumming through my veins. Fear is making my whole body quake. Just writing about it makes my arms go numb. It’s difficult for me to hit the correct keys with my hands shaking so badly.

Joe went to Cindy’s house yesterday because he wanted to see her before he left on his trip? I don’t even know what to think about that. Going over there is so weird.    

 I’m going to be here for a week, and he’ll be going back to Ohio by himself. My thoughts are making me nauseous. Should I just wait and see what happens? If I say something, he will become sneakier. Even if there is ‘nothing’ going on, there is ‘something’ going on. Joe is involved with a woman who idolizes him and in her own words, has slept with most of her friends.  I don’t know if anything will ever be the same. I am so scared. I don’t know what any of this means.